PHOTO: MAURICE FLOOD
“Out of my distress I called to the Lord,
and he answered me;
From the midst of the nether world I cried for help,
and you heard my voice…
Then I said, “I am banished from your sight,
yet would I again look upon your holy temple.”
The waters swirled about me, threatening my life;
the abyss enveloped me; seaweed clung about my head…
But your brought up my life from the pit,
O Lord, my God.
When my soul fainted within me,
I remembered the Lord;
My prayer reached you
in your holy temple. Jon 2, 3; 5-6;7b-8
After a long night of caring for my father, I woke this morning after just a few hours of sleep. Life always looks darker to me when I am exhausted. Jonah’s description of his predicament, prayed from the belly of a whale, resonated with me. Seaweed wasn’t clinging to my head, but similar tangles of dread wrapped themselves around my brain making clear thought impossible and crowding out hope.
Two lines in this reading reached deep into my center. I am banished from your sight, yet would I again look upon your holy temple.” Jonah’s desire to rest in the safety of God’s Presence stirred my soul. “Yes,” I thought, “I want to know the comfort and security of God’s embrace.” I, too, long for oneness with the Compassionate One.
The other verst that spoke to me was: “When my soul fainted within me, I remembered the Lord; My prayer reached you in your holy temple.” What an apt description of my spirit this morning. My soul had, indeed, fainted, unable to do anything but will a prayer as it went down.
I trust my prayer, like Jonah’s, reached the Holy One. What I know that perhaps Jonah did not is that the temple of God is within. The Holy One has been with me all the time. Even before I call out in distress, God knows my need.
The belly of the whale was dark and unpleasant to say the least, but as disgusting as it might have been, it provided safety in the middle of a turbulent sea. The whale deposited Jonah on dry land. I think he must have thought kindly of whales after that.
My dark place looks more like uncertainty than a whale’s stomach, but as uncomfortable as my current situation is, it is slowly bringing me to solid ground. At least Jonah knew he was to go to Nineveh. I have no clue where I will be. But I have this on Jonah: He didn’t know God was right there with him in his whale’s belly. When I make time to be still and pray, I know the Compassionate One is with me in mine.
© 2010 Mary van Balen
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